Fallen Angels

What's wrong with the Angels?

Currently sitting in a tie for 3rd place in the down American League West (10-13), trailing Seattle by 4.5 games, the blaring question in Anahe -- oops -- Los Angeles is, "What's wrong with the Halos?"

Ever since the Angels won their first World Series in 2002, rising expectations have rode this franchise like they were the Chicago Cubs or something.

The majestic, where-in-the-hell-did-this-come-from 2002 season featured an Angels squad full of no-name, home-grown, possibly-good-but-possibly-just-as-bad, up-and-coming players, tenured Angels who had gone through years of cellar-dwelling, and wily veterans who knew this was their only shot to win a World Series. (There we're obviously too many hyphens in that last sentence, let me take a moment to rest.)

Come to think of it, the 2002 Angels resembled Charlie Sheen's Cleveland Indians in "Major League." There wasn't one superstar in the bunch, yet the Halos were able to out duel the loaded - pun intended - San Francisco Barry Bonds' in seven games.

Though the Angels won the championship that year, Barry Bonds was the star of that World Series hitting tape-measure shot after tape-measure shot.

(In fact, a couple weeks ago my family and I tried to list all the players from that 2002 World Series roster. We we're only able to name about 15 out of a 40 man roster.)

Over the years, we've began to change our identity. With the additions of Vladimir Guerrero, Torii Hunter, and most recently Bobby Abreu, the Angels have shredded the no-name, built-from-the-ground-up cast. Unfortunately, it hasn't exactly led to playoff success on the diamond.

Sure we've won an average of 91 games over the last six years, but our playoff history goes as follows:
2003: missed playoffs.
2004: ALDS (lost to the Red Sox, 3-0)
2005: ALCS (beat the Yankees, 3-2; lost to the White Sox, 4-1)
2006: missed playoffs.
2007: ALDS (lost to the Red Sox, 3-0)
2008: ALDS (lost to the Red Sox, 3-1)

Granted making the playoffs for some teams is an accomplishment in itself, but for an Angels team that annually ranks in the top 10 in Major League Baseball in total team salary, a one-and-done season is an unfulfilled season.

And due to our recent inability to make it out of the ALDS these last two years (damn Red Sox) the Angels have tried to beef up their lineup and bullpen by making a splash in the free-agent market. Though the Angels have had some successful acquisitions over the years (See: Vladimir Guerrero, Torii Hunter, Orlando Cabrera, Mark Teixiera) the Halos have seen their fair share of free-agent busts (See: Bartolo Colon, Gary Matthews Jr., Juan Rivera)

The signings, sprinkled in with home-grown talent (See: Chone Figgins, Mike Napoli, John Lackey, Howie Kendrick) have continuously put the Angels in the running for the World Series each year. I can't count the number of times Sports Illustrated has picked us to win the World Series (SI jinx, anyone?).

What's intriguing about the Angels is their well-documented ability to play "small-ball." What's lost in all this admiration of "small-ball" is the popular saying "chicks dig the long ball." Throughout his seasons in Anaheim, Vladimir Guerrero has been the only serious Angels threat to hit the ball into the ozone layer with every swing of the bat.

There's something about a Guerrero at-bat that fills Angel Stadium with pure electricity. The anticipation of a 450-foot bomb is not only felt in the stands, it's felt on the field. This intimidation have worked in Vladdy's favor over the years as he's compiled 159 dingers over his six-year tenure in Anaheim and 393 longballs in his 14-year career.

So with all this said, what is wrong with the 2002 World Series Champs?

1. The Nick Adenhart Tragedy. If the Angels bounce back and end up winning the American League West it'll be a miracle to say the least. The emotional strength it takes to play through such a devastating, devastating tradegy is God-like. Had the Angels decided to mail it in for the year, I don't think anyone would've blamed them. This tragedy will resonate with the Angels' family forever.

2. The relief pitching is horrendous. Actually, horrendous doesn't accurately describe it. Godawful, appalling, nauseating, these words more accurately describe the current bullpen situation. What's even more dumbfounding is the fact the Angels have consistently had one of the best bullpens in the majors. This season is a completely different story. Our two most reliabe relievers have baffled me to no end:

Scot Shields - one of the three remaining 2002 World Series Champion players - has looked out of funk all season. Maybe the deal he made with the devil to develop a rubber arm expired this year (he once threw 262 pitches in defeat during a college game - the reason for his number 62) and now we're seeing the real Scot Shields. Known for having one of the deadliest curveballs in the big, the ol' 12-6 isn't looking too good so far. I mean, unless we're playing slow pitch softball now and I just didn't get the memo.

Jose Arrendondo - who I prematurely anointed as the next prolific Angels closer - isn't looking up-to-snub either with a 6.55 ERA in 11 innings pitched this year. I saw all the closer potential in the world in this kid last year. Head-turning stuff, an undeniable swagger and a puzzling mystique combined to remind me of the artist formerly known as Francisco Rodriquez.

During this time period I even went as far to say we didn't need to sign a closer this off-season because Arrendondo would slide right in to K-Rod's vacated spot. Silly me.

3. Effective money management. Are we sure Gary Matthews Jr. isn't a distant relative of Bernie Madoff? Can we get a DNA test to prove that he's not?

We signed "Sarge Jr." in 2007 and have been wishing Dr. Emmett Brown would show up in the Delorean ever since. We signed Matthews after he had a breakout (better known as a "contract") year - with the Texas Rangers in 2006. Like many ballclubs do, the Angels ignored Matthews' complete body of work (average season pre-2006: .260/8/33) and decided to sign him based off his inflated "contract" year numbers (2006: .313/19/79). If you become the owner of a major league baseball team: DON'T DO THAT!!!

In '07 Matthews followed up his breakout/"contract" year by hitting an abysmal .252 and just when you thought it couldn't get worse, he followed up that less-than-impressive year with an even worse .242 average. Since '07 the Angels have poured over $30 million into this guy and his contract still has TWO MORE YEARS AND MILLIONS MORE DOLLARS ON IT!!! Arrrrrrrgh!

I mean, you know your signing was a mistake when two years into your five-year, multi-million dollar contract the Angels acquire someone else who plays your exact position and they're willing to pay him and play him more.

The same goes for Juan Rivera too.

So you're telling me this summer we decided to invest our money into a mediocre outfielder who's never hit more than 23 homers in a year and has had a history of injuries instead of chasing one of the greatest right-handed batters of all time? Did we at least get some free balls in the deal?

You can't tell me signing Manny Ramirez wouldn't have re-energized the Angels faithful. And all this talk about Manny possibly not being happy in Anaheim ... we're right next to Disneyland for God's sake! The Happiest Place on Earth! How could Manram not enjoy living next to Disneyland for two to three years?

Instead, he's hitting dingers for our hated crosstown rival and we're left with Juan Rivera (a fourth outfield, at best) hitting .200 for three years. Grrrrrreat.

You wanna talk about wasted money, you got to mention Kelvim Escobar. His 101-90 career record and 4.15 career ERA is less than steller yet we're paying him like he's post-glasses Ricky Vaughn. Better yet, we payed him $9.5 million last year to ride the pine with a bum shoulder. His reward? Another $10 million this season to pitch against Single-A, Double-A and Triple-A kids all season. Gotta love this damn country!

Justin Speier. For all of you who don't know who Speier is, there's good reason. This guy is making $4.75 million this year to place the ball delicately on a tee for every batter he faces. Putting this guy in the game for relief is equivalent to waving the white flag in the battlefield. We've admitted defeat, just please try and keep the damage to a minimum.

So what's wrong with the Angels?

It could be the tragic events of April 9, 2009 or the continuous struggle of the usually-trustworthy bullpen or the vital miscalculations of money management. Whatever it is, it better get fixed - fast.

Or else, we're going to turn into Cubs fans. And we've only been waiting seven years.